Thursday, April 21, 2011

"I've Eaten More Queens than Lancelot!"

When I grow up, I want to be an Italian mobster.

What? My middle school always told me I could be whatever I wanted to be.

True, they probably didn't have this in mind...

...and yes, I'm not Italian... but whatever!

Recently, I've been renting and watching a lot of "The Sopranos." I'm barely on volume two of the first season, but it's turning out to be very entertaining. It's burned a hole through the vampire-magic-mystery stuff I usually watch, which has been very, very enlightening. Not to mention, for a very forward idea, it is extremely subtle.

For example, in the first season, there's this episode where Carmela Soprano and the Priest are both alone in the house. It gets very psychological; exploring Carmela's distance from her Mob Boss husband and her regret, guilt and repentance over said husband's job, whilst simultaneously showing her and the priest's mutual attraction. Then, instead of acting on that passion and unresolved sexual tension, the priest decides to have her confess and then gives her communion.

People, that is the most sexually charged communion I have ever seen, off or on screen. (Although, off screen, a sexually charged communion would be pretty goddamn awkward.) Not to mention, the whole communion deal was a thinly disguised metaphor for sex. I have to give the writers their fucking props... it was so fucking interesting, not to mention ironic, that they would give such a holy aspect that edge of sex and attraction. Shit, the church should be getting pissed over this, instead of "Judas."

-> Yes, I know, this show is old, but I don't remember anything being said over it, while the church gets all bitchy over Lady Gaga acting out a scene from the bible (not offending anyone) this got away? Really, now.

But truthfully, this show is fucking awesome. It lacks that random sex that every other HBO television show has. You know, those random sex scenes that exist in every fucking episode and have absolutely no point? Like:

Janie: Omg, my grandma died!
Danny: She did?
Danny: That sucks.
Janie: You want to have sex now?

---Cue ten minutes of softcore porn---

Seriously. True Blood, anyone? Sookie and Bill sleep together the day her grandmother dies. I'm sorry, that's just fucking tacky.

But "The Sopranos" lacks this (or at least it isn't as tacky) and it does the show a fucking service. Because it is fucking awesome. "The Sopranos" is what new TV should try to be! None of this fucking Jersey Shore, reality TV shit.

Reality TV is killing pop culture.

Speaking of the death of Pop Culture, tomorrow is Friday!!

-Friday, Friday, Gotta get down on Friday! Don't forget people! Before Friday, comes Thursday, Then comes Friday, Then Saturday, and Sunday comes afterwards!-

Someone has to help that bitch find a seat. Seriously.

If I could upload audio, I would add a snippet of me singing that atrocity. I would say butchering it, but it does a pretty good job of butchering itself- it does not need my help. In fact, I think my singing would make it better, and that's saying something!

On other news, I'm going to Little Tokyo tomorrow. I'm looking forward to cheap Pocky. And, I'm impatiently awaiting the Judas video, coming out sometime soon. For some reason I cannot find a set date for it. But i'm waiting, nonetheless. Also: check out my post on Lady Gaga- I did not get a chance to shamelessly promote it anywhere. Once again, let me know of you know every artist I mention in it. Click Here.

Speaking of impatiently waiting, I'm also waiting for Keys' newest mixtape to drop (Gypsies, Tramps and Thieves), since she is now my favorite female rapper. For those who don't know, Keys The Problem is that rapper from Baltimore who famously dissed Nicki Minaj for her idiotic "barbie" image and stupid ass elementary-school rhymes. She's fucking awesome. (I provided the link, btw.) I've been consoling myself by listening to her first mixtape and the Roman's Revenge remix she made with A. Tamaris - both which are really good. Also, for those of you who like JStar, listen to "I Hate Music." It's the B-Side to "Heart Surgery (Isn't That Bad)"

Okay, before I go I log off, my song of the week (because I actually have time to think of one today) is Judas (big surprise) for the sole reason that I really like the beat during the bridge. That, and I'm waiting for the music video. If you have not listened to it, you should. It's so industrial.

With that, my possibly non-existent readers, I take my leave.

(You guys should show me that you do exist, and comment.)


Monday, April 18, 2011

The Fame Monster

Okay, I know that I haven't blogged in a while and then to have my most recent post be about Lady Gaga... hmmm...

I was about to apologize. But then I realized I don't give a shit. Get over it or stop reading.

Anyway, back to Lady Gaga. People are bitching and moaning about her new sound being too industrial and too much like techno and they wish she could return to "The Fame" style of music.

Did anyone see anything wrong with that sentence? They wish she could return to "The Fame" style of music. Anyanka, get 'em.

(If anyone gets that reference, please tell me. It would be refreshing to know that pop culture isn't completely dead.)

Why the fuck would you want Lady Gaga to return to "The Fame"? In my not-so-humble opinion, "The Fame" was her worst album! Not to say it was bad, just compared with "The Fame Monster" and what we've heard from "Born This Way" it just doesn't compete. It annoys me when people say they want "the old Gaga back." I'm really not sure why people would want her to stay in that on little hole for the rest of her career! She's an innovator- she's breathed life into the pop game and wanting her to stay in that one little niche is like telling her to start selling canned music and stay exactly the same forever. I'm sorry, that would get fucking boring as hell. If she had stayed and continued with those ideals, the same people bitching now will bitch about her lack of creativity and such.

Me? Personally, I loved "Born This Way" and "Judas." The meanings behind those songs, and the sounds, really emphasize the overall theme of freedom, the theme that we're expecting for the album.

Also, on the cover: Get the fuck over it. It's fucking hilarious and memorable. Why would you want it "more elaborate"? Do you want her dressed like a gazelle? Did you want her with glitter and vomit down the majority of her outfit? Blueberry boobs? Whips and chains? Butcher knives and black vinyl stilettos? Speaking with a British accent? Wearing a tacky, ghetto version of her "LoveGame" video costumes? What! Gosh...

(Also, if someone can name all the artists I just referenced... that would be awesome. LOL)

Okay, I'm gone.

I'll try to blog later. : )